Sudden Realizations Are Rarely As Sudden As They Seem

I've been working on a poem called 'Epiphany' for ages. It started with a single line years ago - "I created my god, who made yours?". And then it just sat there, in an unnamed text file on my computer, until a few months ago, when I suddenly got the inspiration to try and finish it. I haven't yet, or I'd be posting it here, but I did make progress...

Anyway, it struck me that I came up with that line at a time I was still struggling to hold on to the faith I was brought up in; and I started wondering just about when I started questioning religion, when I first departed from the dogmas that had been drilled into me... The funny thing is I can't really pinpoint any specific thing...

If forced to pick a moment, I'd say it was the time I realized the Catholic church isn't half as tolerant as I had idealized it to be - when I was told the official doctrine was that Jesus was the way, the truth and the life, not just a way, a truth or a life.

But that was just part of an awakening I'd been struggling to deny for the longest time... Even when I was a child, I don't recall ever believing in an interventionist god - my god of the time was more of an imaginary friend, to whom I'd retreat and talk about things, especially when I was down about something or the other. Had to deal with a spot of bullying during my first year in a new school, a period when I was my most 'religious' in any sense. But I wasn't at all ritualistic (at least not religiously).

A Truth-seeker's Creed

Though steeped in ignorance and imperfection, though possessing a flawed perception and understanding, I hope I might, I hope I may, see the world as it is today.

As I journey in my quest for answers, may I ever wary be of those that seek to give pause to curiosity.

May I revel in mystery, but not as an end in itself, rather as a challenge to be overcome or an opportunity to explore.

May I be brave enough to challenge my beliefs, no matter how resolutely I may hold on to them, for if something can be destroyed by the truth, it should. May I be steadfast in finding the truth rather than proving anything to be true.

May I not be fooled by what is merely elegant, but seek what controls my anticipation and predicts results, which may itself be elegant, though this is in no way a prerequisite.

And yet, may I appreciate the elegance of this universe and its ways. May I be and live in awe of the sheer grandeur and magnificence of existence, always.

May I seek perfection, so that every step forward encourages one more, so that I never pause and look at what is accomplished as enough, so that I journey on to a boundless future.

May I not limit my thirst for knowledge for any reason. May I seek and seek and seek, for this universe is so grand and there is so much more to see.